This happened in Summer 2010
This is pretty long so the highlights are:
-met a girl at the Hawthorne Bar and took her to the park for some hot sex within 15 mins
-then when straight to Cheers Nightclub and pulled a different girl into the toilets for sex after 2 minutes
I was in the city doing a coaching session and a I get call from my wing girl saying she’s eager to go pick up. I’m dressed in a suit jacket and well-wrapped scarf, I’m looking sharp, handsome and dashing.
I’ve been experimenting with a new kind of game recently. Its REALLY low energy… I will literally find a seat, and just SIT there, being still, both internally and externally, and getting in touch with the dynamics, energy and flow of the room.
It’s such a massive contrast to how I used to be when I was out. I used to go into a club, be all nervous, be looking around, be freaking out about what people were thinking, when I was gonna do my first open, what I would say etc. I would talk way too much, make pointless observational comments ‘this line is taking ages’ ‘this music’s loud’ ‘this song sucks’ ‘that girl looks like someone from my old work’ etc.
I used to be really jittery and nervous internally and externally. It still got scattered results, obviously because I was high energy I was talking to a lot of girls and some of them were receptive, but in terms of maximizing my impact that I had on each girl I was really wasting a lot of energy.
So last night, we rock into the Hawthorn. It’s a really loud, uni party style bar, heaps of 19-22 year old uni students, mostly glam girls and jock dudes.
I walk in, REALLY fucking slow, all the Shaolin state control shit I’ve picked up off James is kicking into gear. I’m really calm, relaxed, and taking in the whole room. My head moves slowly, all my actions are deliberate, and I only speak when necessary.
We go to the dance floor and my wing girl and the two other dudes with us are all bubbly; drinking and dancing. I just lean against the wall, holding space and centering myself, while I drink in the room. It’s a weird paradox because I’m totally removing myself from the environment and separating myself so I can observe it, but it takes me to a new level of hyper awareness of everything, so that I’m am MORE immersed in the moment and the room.
Looking back, it’s like in the video game Max Payne when you use bullet time to slow everything down. Everything is happening so slowly around me, it’s like I can anticipate everything before it happens.
In The Matrix, Neo can see the code, he can see the matrix, and its like he’s separate from everyone else walking around in the system, but he’s still IN the system, so instead of making him separate, it just allows him to navigate the matrix better and bend it to his will to manifest what he wants.
I felt like I was Neo from the Matrix, in the space, separate, but also part of it, and able to assess it from a new angle. My awareness took me to a new level of immersion in the environment.
I talk to a few girls here and there, and its funny because action-wise its still very similar to how I used to be when I was high energy, I still just chat to people in line etc. Now it’s just like I’m on this new level where I’m not thinking ‘better chat to people to get in state’ or something, I just DO it. I feel so comfortable in the environment, and with myself, that its like I’m at my own house party and everything already knows me. I don’t have to prove myself to anyone, and it’s a strange thing because I’m willing for them to judge me and hate me… but then again paradoxically it doesn’t happen BECAUSE of that non-attachment. They see that I don’t give a fuck, and respect me for it.
I think part of this mindset might come from me having done so much night game coaching lately, that its allowed me to observe bars and clubs from a new angle, and now that I’m in there to pick up myself, its like I’m my own best coach.
I haven’t actually been out to do nightgame to pick up for agessssssssss. There are a few reasons for this: I prefer daygame, I hate late nights, I’m more focused on my music at the moment, and I already have ladies in my life. But my recent drought (haven’t been able to see my main girlfriend for a few weeks for reasons I wont go into here) plus the prospect of picking up with a wing girl inspired me to get back into it.
All the words of wisdom that have left my mouth to enlighten students have been trickling into my subconscious for the last few months, so when I actually go out to implement it myself it’s automatic.
I spend about 40 minutes approaching girls, some of them I just chat with, some of them I get their number. I was on my own by this point because my wing girl already left. This is important in itself, the fact that I was cool to just hang out and chat to people without my friends there says a lot about how relaxed and comfortable I am in the bar environment now. This is the polar opposite of what I used to be like, and it’s a product of years of exploring my internal reactions and getting a feel and control for my energy.
Another thing worth noting is obviously not every girl I approach was receptive: the fact that I didn’t take the rejections personally and just kept rolling with it is also important. If I had given up at this point I never would have experienced the wild adventures that were to follow.
After spending some time in the smokers area making new friends, I go back to sitting REALLY still on the couch, just relaxing and getting in touch with the dynamics of the room. I feel like those wilderness trackers who can pick up the vibe of the forest.
As I’m sitting there, every 30 or 40 seconds a pair of hot girls will come and sit on the couch opposite me, and I would move couches and talk to them.
There’s a few other people on the couches near me, and if they were watching me it would be very obvious what I was doing, talking to every girl that sits near me. This is where all that social freedom stuff comes in: I felt a bit weird knowing that they were watching me pick up and fail multiple times, but I didn’t let that stop me.
I could have easily been like ‘oh that dudes watching me, he saw me fail 3 times, I should stop. He’ll think I have shit game, or that I’m a desperate loser, or a creep.’
The 4th one was where it got interesting, so I’m glad I stuck it out.
Opened two girls by telling them it looks like they are checking the camera to make sure no bad photos get on Facebook. Chat to them for a bit, one of them starts dancing with her boyfriend, but the other one is investing heaps. Leaning in really close, long eye contact, touching me all the time. She has a really sexy energy and it makes me really horny.
We chat about architecture shaped like dicks, she tells me her friends moving to NZ, I say she can dress me in a wig and I’ll pretend to be her friend. I say ‘so you better get my number.’ She gets her phone out and puts it in. We bounce to a couch, she sits REALLY close to me, and I say ‘I’m gonna be really honest…you have an awesome sexual energy. This is what you’re doing to me’ and put her hand on my boner.
She giggles, and we keep chatting. This is a perfect example of me reading the situation and knowing from her signs that she was ready for that kind of sexual touching. It was still very subtle; much more subtle than if I had kissed her in front of everyone. It’s sexy for her because it’s like its our little secret and no one else in the bar knows.
Furthermore the fact that I’m so relaxed about it allows her to enjoy it without feeling weird. Your vibe is contagious, and if you’re nervous you’re going to infect her with nervousness too.
I find out her parents are strict and tell her that means she’s probably a bad girl who loves rebelling. She agrees. I say “lets do something crazy…lets go for a walk RIGHT NOW.”
I burn her with deadly intent, unwavering sexual eye contact, which she matches.
She looks into my eyes and sees that I’m serious, and then agrees. I take her by the hand, and lead her outside.
We walk outside, she starts asking me a bunch of questions so she feels less slutty about fucking me, and I just chat happily about my family and music. My vibe is very relaxed and not overtly projecting sexual intent, but I’m speaking slowly and calm, so it’s ambiguous in a good way.
We get to the park, I kiss her, and she says we should go somewhere darker. I take her behind a tree, we start kissing and things get hot and heavy.
What follows is the best reason to get your inner game tight and get clear on your intent and beliefs, to be congruent with your beliefs, and to be able to effectively communicate them to the universe/other people.:
She says ‘I’m not fucking you tonight…you have to wait’.
Now, in my reality, this is BULLSHIT. She wants to fuck me, and I oppose the whole ‘women using sex as a power tool’ paradigm with a passion. However, I’m not angry about it, I understand why they say those things, and that it usually relates to past experiences and social conditioning etc.
So I say ‘I’m gonna be totally honest with you, just like I have been so far. I think that whole idea is fucked. I hate the way women are demonized for being sexual, and I actually think sexually liberated girls are way cooler’
‘Umm…can I just say something…..I luuuuuuuuuuve sex’ she purrs.
‘I know. And you saying that you want to make me wait is such a silly concept.’
‘But so many guys just bail after they fuck me, I want to see you again.’
‘Okay I’ll be straight with you. I will be more likely to want to see you again if we have sex now, because I think girls who just go with the moment and do what they want are way cooler. So if we do the naughty things that I know you want to do right now, I’ll respect you more for not being weird and uptight about sex’.
Now the key part of this is that it’s TRUE. This is not a trick to get her to fuck me. This is my reality. The frame that it implies is powerful: ‘if we have sex now, you are cool!’ which is in direct contrast to most guys which is ‘if we have sex now, you are a worthless slutty whore that I never want to see again.’
This went on for about 2 minutes, me clarifying my mindsets, and at some point I started fingering her. After a while she just said ‘lets have sexxxxxxx’
I put on a condom, rolled her stockings down and pulled up her skirt, turned her around and pressed her up against the tree while I entered her. Her ass was amazing, and looked so hot shining in the moonlight.
She was really responsive and let herself go, telling me how much she likes to be fucked hard etc.
We finished up and started walking back. I started telling her about polyamoury, and she said ‘what, so you sleep with lots of girls…does that mean you’ll never have a partner’ and I said ‘well no, I have a girlfriend. It’s an open relationship.’
She fucking FLIPPED OUT. Start sobbing intensely as tears streamed down her face, calling me a jerk, saying I’m just like every other guy, all guys are dicks, her life is shit, etc.
At this point I could have just been like ‘fuck it, I don’t need this shit’ but I felt a duty of care to her, and stayed with her even when she was telling me to fuck off and being negative towards me.
A lot of the detachment that I’ve built up from coaching was really helpful. I wasn’t getting emotionally invested in an argument, I was just trying to reason with her.
One thing that James really inspired me about was not letting people put you into roles that you don’t represent or value. The example he gives is if you approach a girl and she calls you a creep, you don’t have to accept that title, and you can challenge her on it, not as a way to get her, but just to break her out of her silly reality and reinforce your own one. The time he did it, it was because some girls were trying to pin that identity on a student and he was standing up for him.
The same thing happened here, but with myself. She was basically calling me a jerk, implying I had done something wrong, and reinforcing all these retarded ideas she had about men, so I was very invested her breaking her out of this shit.
I sat there with her for around 20mins, talking her through it and trying to get her to see past the guys that hurt her in the past and see that I wasn’t like those guys.
I was very calm and collected, but I still made it clear how I felt.
‘It’s actually offensive to me what you’re saying. We talked about how shit it is that girls get judged for their sexual behavior, and now you are basically doing the same thing to me. You’re judging me for being a slut without even knowing me, and now you’re telling me to fuck off, so you’re not even giving yourself a chance to get to know me.’
So I guess I got a hint of 0.0000001% of what girls must feel for being judged on their sexuality…it fucking SUCKS.
Her friends came and got her. I spoke to her on the phone today, I did most of the talking, but I think the fact that I even called spoke loud and clear to her that I wasn’t a jerk. The conversation went from me reiterating how she has so many false perceptions about men, and eventually turned to sex. It ended with us talking about sex and both getting really horny.
I was telling her about how I want to fuck her, how I know she wants to fuck me, what it would be like if we were together…
She added me on Facebook that night, and on chat said ‘ohh…you’re right. Now I’m really horny and don’t know what to do!’
Feels pretty good to have been able to deal with her calling me a jerk while sobbing with mascara streaming down her face, holding my intent and identity and not letting her pin the crimes of her previous lovers onto me, and turning it around to the point where she firstly respects me and doesn’t hate all men, and secondly is now open to the potential reality of us having casual sex.
Anyway, I bailed from there and went to Cheers nightclub, chatting up this fashion model chick on the way. She was so beautiful, chocolaty brown skin and deep green eyes. Get her number before meeting my wing girl who had some long silly story about her hooking up with some girl.
I was considering going home, and she goes ‘yeah just come inside for a bit, see what happens’.
I go in, and I’m in the same state as I was before. REALLY relaxed, super still, drinking in my surroundings, not in any rush to be anywhere. I sit alone on a couch a bit a way from the dancefloor, watching the room, and I felt so STILL. Just unrestless, even my usual habit of fiddling my hands was gone. My winggirl was hooking up with some chick, and I could see they were looking over thinking ‘pffft this whole ‘sit alone and do nothing’ game plan that Liam’s running is bullshit…its not working’. Because I was just sitting ALONE in this deserted couch area.
I held out, enjoying my borderline meditation, and eventually two chicks come and sit near me. They’re both on the phone, I look over and grin at them. One leaves, and when the other gets off the phone, she’s sitting there alone, so I motion for her to come over to me.
She sits down and says ‘have you seen my friends?’ and I just think ‘what the fuck…’ Most retarded question ever, I don’t know who she is or who her friends are, and have been sitting in the same spot the whole time. HOW THE FUCK COULD I HAVE SEEN HER FRIENDS. The question makes no sense. But of course I’m aware that it’s really just an excuse to talk to me and start flirting with her.
Anyway, I tell her that it looked like her and the other girl were talking to each other on the phone before, she laughs.
I tell her we can be friends now instead, and she says no, so I say ‘cool we can be enemies. That’s good because it makes it more intense and violent’. I grab her arm, slowly pull it towards my mouth and nibble her inner elbow.
I say something else and she says ‘enemies don’t talk to each other’ and I say ‘oh ok’ and then just sit there in silence, but my hand starts moving up her leg and massaging her inner thigh, slowly first, but then firmer. This goes on for 10 or 20 seconds, with her doing nothing, which I take as passive acceptance. I grab her hand and put it on my boner, and massage her inner arm with my other hand.
I slowly turn into her and kiss her with no resistance. As soon as our lips part, I stand up, take her by the hand, and start leading her through the club. I’m totally in the zone, there’s loud music and distractions everywhere but I’m just walking slowwwwwwwww as, not looking back or hesitating.
I’m still playing along with her ‘enemies don’t talk’ thing. I walk straight to the toilets, go in, and bring her into a cubicle. Luckily there was no one in there when we went in, as it was the girls toilets.
As soon as we get in there I slam her against the wall, pull her up skirt and start fingering her. I whack a condom on, turn her around and bend her over and fuck her silly.
I try to get her to ride me while I sit down, but its too awkward, so I turn her over again and pound her till I blow.
I still haven’t said anything. I pull out my phone, she puts her number in, and leaves.
I walk out of the toilets feeling amazing; my chill factor is growing exponentially.
I end up on a couch with my wing girl and the chick she was picking up.
There was no way this chick could have conformed to her stereotype any more. She was blonde, dressed like a glam girl, and totally bubbly and a bit too drunk.
Talking to her was fun, but not in a way that makes me think she’s cool. It was amazing to meet someone who had such an abrasive personality.
Wing girl introduces us and tells her what just happened, and I say ‘Id shake your hand but it’s covered in two types of pussy juice right now’.
She asked ‘So how did you get them to fuck you?’
Facepalm. (Literally. I used the cum to do my hair, just like in There’s Something About Mary. Just kidding.) Anyway, what she said conflicts with so many of my beliefs, and is borderline insulting, that she has to really press me before I even answer.
‘Get them? GET them? You make it sound like I had to force them or trick them…’
She keeps asking boring questions, conforming to the stereotype that she represents (ditzy dumb club chick) and lowering her value in my eyes.
I feel very healthy about my judgment of her, because I don’t look at her and make that assumption. I’ve met heaps of chicks who look like her and don’t conform to that stereotype. I’ve met chicks who ACT like her, but are actually really smart and are just playing along. But this chick was just …. I don’t know, it’s a grey area. But it was really clear that perceptiveness and self-awareness were not her strong points.
She said ‘so can you get us a drink?’
Again I was facepalming myself. I think it hit harder because I wasn’t a random dude, she could see that I was obviously TIGHT with my wing girl, and she’s still like ‘yeh grab us a drink’, and putting me in the role of random club loser who wants to get a makeout from her.
I go ‘can you buy ME a drink?’ and she looks bewildered. ‘What? No way. Guys buy drinks’
And I go ‘how about you go to McDonald’s and get me a sundae?’
She doesn’t ‘get’ what I’m saying at all. Either that, or its just so far from the reality that she’s used to, which obviously gets reinforced every time that she goes that, that what I’m saying is too foreign for her to grasp.
Later she said ‘People look at me and think I’m just this dumb hot girl, but I’m actually really intelligent. I don’t know how they can just judge me on face value like that’
I said ‘Actually, if you were really intelligent, you WOULD be able to understand why people judge you like that.’
I can’t remember what she said to that, but from her answer it was very clear that the point I was making went straight over her head. She could not have done anything more to brand herself as dumb club chick.
Anyway. My wing girl said ‘dude, when we were talking to that chick you were in some kind of fucking Zen state. I’ve never seen you that chilled out.’
Every time she talked, I would just turn my head REALLY slowly to her. I’d think about my answers for 3-5 seconds, and everything I said and did was super deliberate.
I was SO relaxed. Part of it is ‘outer game’ to the extent that I’ve been gradually training myself to chill out and slow down over the last two years, but so much of it is inner game. Knowing my value, feeling good about myself, feeling confident, not owing anyone anything, not needing validation. Obviously everyone needs validation, it’s just that its harder for me to be validated now because my reality is upgraded. A hot girl just talking to me is not validating.
Its all come back to watching the way James and Zanna operate, with such low energy and investment. It’s about being really selective about when I choose to speak, which makes my words have greater impact. Its like super efficient use of my energy, and it makes my vibe so relaxed that its like everything is happening in slow motion.
So in summary
-Think about how much energy you currently use, and think about what effect alerting this might have. Try going out, and just RELAXING. This is obviously an advanced concept; if you are a new guy, or still have issues approaching, don’t kid yourself into thinking you are just chilling out. But if you can already approach, experiment with slowing down your energy and assessing the situation for the right time to approach, as well as allowing your state to bring girls into your reality. High energy is not for everyone, I would say it actually has a negative effect for many guys.
-Leaving SPACE. There were so many moments in the night when I was talking to a girl, and my old self would have filled in the silence by talking. And not just talking; but talking fast. I’m so relaxed now, that I just wait for the girl to say something. It flips so many typical patterns, because social pressure compels her to talk, and puts her in the mode of trying to keep the conversation going with you, as opposed to you desperately trying to cling onto her by bombarding her with random shit to make yourself sound cool and not letting her say anything. If you don’t leave the space she doesn’t get a chance to show her true self or seduce you at all.
-Own your itent and hold your frame. I REALLY believe that sexually liberated chicks are cool, and they’re the kind of girls I want to hang out with long term. I REALLY think a girl is uncool and clearly not someone who’s ready to be my friend if she’s still at the stage of using sex as a weapon, or thinks that she has to hold off so that guys will respect her. She would have actually lost value in my eyes if we didn’t fuck in the park.
- Having a rapid escalation skillset and being a trigger puller rules. All those nights out practicing rapid physical escalation was a good investment.
-Speaking slow is the best, because it allows you to think of what you’re gonna say next without rushing.
-Always bring condoms, and heaps of ‘em. You never know.