Rapid Escalation

Hey guys. Hope you all liked the Melbourne Cup Infield Pickup Video I recently released with James Marshall.

Here is a full video from start to finish of me chatting up a charming lady with a dark sense of humor.

You’ll notice my voice and body language is very relaxed, and I avoid standard topics like where she works, lives, went to school, or studies.

Instead I take the conversation in a much more risky but much more playful direction, getting us straight into some dark humor. As I say in the video, “I put the [genocide] thing out there to see what she’d say.”

I liked the fact that she can tell I’m joking, and is willing to play along and be spontaneous.

I’m also not afraid to touch her: I lift her up confidently, which allows us to create a good physical connection. You’ll notice I ask ‘can I pick you up’ at 2.58, and gauge her reaction before actually doing it. She asks ‘really?’ she doesn’t say no, and I can feel from the way she leans into my arms that she is comfortable being picked up. I’m not just blindly picking her up, I’m easing into it and feeling out her reaction to make sure she’s comfortable while still confidently leading.

The other thing I like about this pickup is how I’m not trying to win her over, and how we’re both seducing each other. By allowing her to play along and be part of the seduction, it builds our interpersonal connection from the start. Some seducers like to play games and pretend to be something they’re not. You see in this video that being honest, direct and playful is much more effective and allows her to meet the real me.

The flow on effect from this is that she feels comfortable showing her real self to me. She can feel that I don’t have a wall up and it means she doesn’t have to put a wall up either.

I used to have a massive wall up around women, a social mask that stopped us connecting. It was a front, my way to protect myself. The women who met me then could feel it. There was no way they were going to open up to me when I was closed off myself. Dropping that front has made the whole seduction process so much easier and makes me feel so much more relaxed.

I loved the cute ending; her writing me a note on a scrap of paper really rounded off the interaction for me (as well as giving me a great pocket square.)

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